Honest

One from the archives...




Arielle: "I hope you will like my book."
Rick: "I'm sure I will like it more than your hat."

 
    
And another...




Arielle comes upstairs after working out.
Rick hugs her.
Arielle: "You don't want to touch me; I'm sweaty."
Rick (as he pushes her away, making a face): "You're right! - I don't!"
  
  

Helpful

On the way home from work today, Rick is driving as usual. In a lefthand turning lane, we stop at a light...a green light. There are about 3 cars ahead of us and the car at the front of the line is not turning. There are no cars coming from the other direction.

Rick, without hesitation, slams his hand down on the horn and holds it there.

Me (trying to get him to ease up and chill out): "Oh come on, come on."

The car at the front of the line finally turns as Rick rolls his eyes.

Me: "Aww, he's probably an old guy. Look at the car he's driving."

Rick (ass-like tone at full capacity): "Well, that's why I'm helping him."