Frugal

Arielle and Rick are in the kitchen, discussing Juice, one of their cats.

Arielle (in her cat momma voice): "I'm sorry, Juice, I know you have issues. You need psychotherapy, but we can't afford it."

Rick: "That's right, Juice, we only have enough money for psychotherapy for your momma."

Job-Oriented

Arielle (to Rick): "You would be a very poor social worker."

Rick (to Arielle): "You would be a very poor accountant."

Both laugh.

Loving

True story.

Arielle's Saturday work days are finally over. She finally has a weekend. She no longer has to get up early on Saturdays and drag herself to work. This has been a YEARS-long wait and it has JUST this weekend finally arrived...thus, it is Saturday morning and Arielle is sleeping at last.

At 8:00 am the house phone rings twice. Rick (who is downstairs and awake) grabs it.

Caller: "Rick? Is this Rick?"

Rick: "YES?!"

Caller: "This is the Association of Firefighters..."

Rick: "THANKS FOR WAKING UP MY WIFE, YOU F**KING ASSHOLE!!!!" He slams down the phone.

Sorry for the language... but like I said, true story. :-)

Validating

Arielle is feeling guilty for not spending a lot of time with Rick.

She comes downstairs to make dinner and is talking to Rick about things she'll be doing this week, feeling a bit like a horrible wife.

Rick mentions that his friend Stan called.

Arielle: "Does Stan think I'm a horrible wife?"

Rick: "Everyone knows you're a horrible wife. I have a blog called 'My Horrible Wife.'"

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Nostalgic

It is election day and Arielle is preparing to vote. She is going off on tangents about women fighting for the right to vote and how she won't take it for granted.

Arielle: "Do you realize that 100 years ago, women weren't even allowed to vote?"

Rick: "Ah, the good old days."

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Enthusiastic

Rick and Arielle are discussing shows waiting on the DVR. Rick hates most of the ones Arielle watches.

Rick mocks Project Runway for a while.

Arielle: "I have to watch Glee too."
Rick (with mock enthusiasm and a big grin): "I think they should just COMBINE Glee and Project Runway!"

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Astute

Arielle calls to order Chinese food, gives her order, repeats it a couple of times.

She hangs up the phone and says: "Literally, that was a 10 year old. I was talking to a 10 year old."

Rick: "He's probably saying the same thing about you right now."

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Realistic

Arielle has just woken up on a Sunday morning. She is now downstairs and Rick is upstairs. She hears a door open so she goes to the bottom of the stairs to look up at him and talk to him.

Arielle (cheerfully, from the bottom of the stairs): "Hi, baby!"

Rick (looking down at her from several feet up): "Hi, dear. Well, don't you look cute!"

Arielle: "Aw, I do?"

Rick: "Well - at least from here."

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Reasonable

Arielle: "What are we having for dinner tonight?"

Rick: "Beans and franks."

Arielle: "Oh cool, we can pretend we're camping."

Rick: "You can eat outside."

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Clever

Rick is being a sarcastic ass.
Arielle: "Man, you're a jerk and a half."
Rick: "No, I'm two, two, two jerks in one."
He laughs appreciatively at himself.
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Responsible

Arielle opens the refrigerator. Rick is in the living room.
Arielle: "Rick, can I have a beer?"
Rick: "No, wait until you're 21."

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Logical

After 6 days of being terribly ill with what is probably the flu, Arielle stands in the kitchen and announces: "I feel like a human girl!"

Rick , looking her up and down: "You don't look like one."

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Festive

Arielle: "I want one of those pretty, white light up deer for the front yard."

Rick: "I don't think so."

Arielle: "Not this year, just one day. Look - our neighbors have one!"

Rick: "So what's the difference? Pretend that it's ours."

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Mindful

Arielle and Rick are making homemade fried chicken together in the kitchen. (That was the first mistake.)
Arielle has been giving instructions, explaining a plethora of information. She has been talking for probably 5 minutes straight.

Rick asks what to do next.

Arielle: "I already told you. Twice. Do you remember?"

Rick: "I'm trying not to pay attention."

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Mature

Rick: "Are you coming to bed?"

Arielle: "Rick, it's 7:57."

Rick: "Oh come on, it's 8:00."

Arielle: "Okay, it's 8:00. Do I look like I'm 5 years old?"

Rick: "Yes."

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Political

It's the first day of school in the neighborhood of Arielle and Rick. There is a school bus at the curb and lots of little children are piling in. Parents are snapping photos.

Arielle and Rick are driving by in their car, on their way to work.
Arielle (cheerfully): "Aw look! The parents are taking pictures of the really little ones. It's probably their first day of school EVER. They're embarking on their long journey of education!"

Rick: "Their long journey of INDOCTRINATION."

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Fashion-Conscious

Arielle: "I just want a curly, pretty, short haircut."

Rick (with raised eyebrows): "There is no such thing."

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Prophetic

Arielle and Rick are on their way to Wegmans on Saturday morning. Rick is being an ass.

Arielle: "Maybe you'll like me better once I've had my coffee."

Rick: "Maybe I'll like you less."

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Generous

Rick is driving to the grocery store on a Saturday morning. Arielle is in the passenger's seat.

Arielle is talking, complaining about something.

Rick (cutting her off): "Do me a favor - don't talk until you buy yourself a coffee."

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Selective

Being the loving wife she is, Arielle is at the hairdresser with Rick to wait for him while he gets a haircut.

Arielle is flipping through a magazine with Rick next to her while she waits for Rick to get called back for his appointment.

Arielle: "Look - they're making a big deal out of Taylor Swift dating Jake Gyllenhal because of their 9 year age difference. 9 years. She's turning 21 and he's 30. Who cares! 9 years! That's nothing!"

Rick (agreeing): "That is nothing."

Arielle: "I guess they're making a big deal out of it because Taylor Swift is so young."

Rick (with a satisfied grin on his face): "Gotta get while the gettin's good."